SLAM DUNK WAS CREATED JUST IN TIME FOR EXPO 86 IN VICTORIA, BC ON NOVEMBER 10, 1969 IN A FAKE PLASTIC BIOSPHERE. THE BAND IS NOT A BAND, BUT IS INSTEAD A VERY DANGEROUS IDEA THAT YOU MAY OR MAY NOT WANT TO HAVE WRITTEN ON YER T-SHIRT. THEIR MENTOR BIG J TURNED THEM ONTO A SIMPLE WAY OF PERFORMING OUTRAGEOUS AND HEAVILY CATHARTIC MUSICAL MOVEMENTS THAT, WHEN PERFORMED CORRECTLY, TURNED AUDIENCES INTO A WILTED AND SWEATY PUDDLE.

THEY TEACH YOUNG CHILDREN BASIC READING, PUNK ROCK, HEBREW, AND ARITHMETIC. ALSO: WHEN TO TURN UP THE BASS, HOW TO MAKE BURRITOS, LOVE LETTERS, HERBAL DECOCTIONS, NUMBERS, SLAM DUNK DANCING, AND THE DAYS OF THE WEEK. SLAM DUNK ALSO FOCUSES ON BASIC LIFE-SKILLS SUCH AS HOW TO MAKE BALANCED 3 MINUTE GRIMY-BURIED-ALIVE PUNK SONGS, OR THE IMPORTANCE OF BASIC HYGIENE. THEY ARE ALSO FAMOUS FOR THE USE OF EXTINCT CREATURES, CORPSE PAINT, AND THE MANTRA OF FOOD BEFORE AND AFTER EVERYTHING.

SLAM DUNK'S FORMAT OF CATCHY SING-A-LONGS AND GENRE-BUSTING BREAKDOWNS, BUILT WITHOUT A THEME, WILL INDUCE A COSMIC AND SLOBBERING ATTENDANCE TO ANY DANCE HALL BOOKED. THEY WILL SHOW UP LATE, PLAY SHORT SETS, EAT YOUR FOOD, AND SLEEP IN YOUR BED. NOTHING BUT FUN WILL COME OF IT, AND YOU WILL WAKE UP THROBBING WEEKS AFTER, JONESIN' FOR ANOTHER ROUND OF THE DUNK!